Territorial Pissing

On the way back from Mount Gambier yesterday, we saw this dopey little bugger sitting right in the middle of the road.

 

 

 

 

I had to pull over, get out and move him. It’s a busy truck route between Portland and the Mount, & I couldn’t just leave him there.

 

 

I tried quite a few times to move him off the road- but this wilful little turd wasn't moving for anyone! 

 

 

 

 

So after a few attempts to shepherd him toward the safety of the nature strip, I made an executive decision to forcibly evict him before any heavy traffic came to clean us both up!!

 

 

 

 

So I picked him up, and carried him off the road.
 

 

 

It’s no good dumping a Koala on the side of the road; you have to take them near a tree, a reasonable distance from the road.
 

 

  

 

Hopefully, they will also be sufficiently aggravated so they aren’t tempted to return to the blacktop.

 

 

 

And aggravated he was...the grumpy bugger gave me a love bite.
 

 

 

YEOWWWW!!!!
 

 

 

 

 I set him down pretty sharpish, and watched him head for safety.

 

 

Koala rescuer?

Maybe- maybe not. It occurs to me…

This little fellow might have had enough. He may have wanted to commit suicide.

How would I know for sure? Why can’t animals get tired of living too?

I might have buggered his plans. He looked like he had a pretty good idea what he was doing.

No wonder he was cross.

What makes me think I know better than the koala?

It was actually a selfish act on my part; regardless of what he wanted…I didn’t want to leave him there to be hit by a truck.

Plus it was a great photo op, as you can see.

Maybe I deserved to be bit, the price of my pictures.

Penance for thinking I know better than the koala.

In my defence; Koala’s do tend to get a little groggy, hopped up on gum leaves.

They can also be very territorial, and this one was certainly arrogant. He wasn’t moving for anyone.

My way- the highway.

Maybe he really had no idea what might be about to happen.

PLUS…I use this stretch of road quite a bit. If I saw his carcass on the road (& no truck would have stopped for him- suicide for the driver) I would have felt bad.

& I am getting tired of taking koalas who have been hit to the vet.

We do what we do, for better or worse.

I guess as long as we think about what we do when it comes to nature. 

It's a balancing act. 

But I admit, I’m glad I stopped.

If I hadn’t…

I don’t think I would have been able to sleep.
 

HOUSE PROUD

 

Tell me...

Do you open your door & let unpleasant people into your home? 

I don't. 

Are negative thoughts any different?? 

& our heads are more precious than our houses.

So why do it? 

Every Time I Fuck Something Up...

I fucked up again. 

It was just a little thing...said the wrong thing, misjudged my humour...

And there was de-friending and blocking...etc...

Over, right?

Nope.

Why??

Because it burned.   

Why did it burn?

Well...I don't like to hurt people; and if I think I might have done that...

It hurts me. 

But it's more than that. 

When I have fucked something up...it REALLY BURNS.  I literally get a burning sensation around my forehead, neck, and down my back. 

Why is that?

Well, every time I fucked up as a kid...I was punished for it by my Dad. 

Nowadays...I fuck up, and I feel like I'm in the shit again. 

This is NOT a prompt to feel sorry for myself. 

Dad is dead...I'm an adult...& I can move on now.

Theoretically. 

But it is one thing to KNOW this, and another to do it. 

Indeed- we can know something logically...

But to know it with every fibre of our being, and to then act upon it...

That's a different kettle of fish. 

We need to dive inside the pain.

And question it- CHALLENGE IT. 

It is well worth looking at what causes certain sensations. 

Sensations that don't help us. 

So I take a look at my emotions, and the triggers. 

So I said the wrong thing. 

So what??

Did I kill anybody??

No. 

Did I maim anybody?

No. 

Did I damage any property?  Poison any minds?  Throw the planet off it's axis??

No. 

Will the people I offended even REMEMBER this incident next week?

Probably not. 

So why should I??

Why should I BURN for a minor social faux pas?

Because I am conditioned to burn. 

As a child...I was taught to burn by my Father when I did something wrong.

Why?  I don't know. 

For my benefit...or his??

Likely his. 

Is it serving me any longer?

No. 

Will burning for these infractions help anybody else, or save the planet?

Nope. 

Does anyone care if I burn, or want me to burn?

No. 

So why hang onto it?

Habit?

Maybe. 

There are good habits, and bad habits. 

I have given up bad habits before- even tenacious ones like SMOKING.

So...why not give this one up?

I cannot think of any reasons to keep allowing myself to burn when I fuck something up.

We all fuck things up. 

All of us; all the time.

We are human beings...delivered down some random chute...

Dumped in the middle of god knows what...

With precious little sensible data...

Very little sense of direction...

All of us heading for certain DEATH!!

NO WONDER WE FUCK UP!!

Why should we burn for it?

We shouldn't. 

So fuck up.

Until you get it right.

Try not to hurt anybody. 

And try to be happy. 

Don't burn yourself up- that's firewood's job.

We're not firewood. 

Our job is to fuck up.

Firewood doesn't have that rare priveligde.

We do.

So...Fuck Up and Die??

No.  NEVER. 

I say...

Fuck up...

And LIVE. 



    

I'M PROPER

The more I say the word 'LOVE'...

The more often I REPEAT it...

the less it feels like something to be afraid of. 

And the less I fear LOVE...the more comfortable I become with it.

& the more comfy I am with LOVE...

the more likely I am to do it PROPERLY.

& why do something unless you intend to do it properly??

<3 nbsp="" p="">

'If You're Building...'

I wouldn't say 'It's Complicated' if I were you. 

It generally means YOU'RE complicated.

If you are in any doubt about the durability of your current relationship (& I am willing to bet my left nut that in saying 'it's complicated' on their profile, most people are here looking to hop onto another lily pad)...do you really want that on your resume?

Would YOU be attracted to someone who is 'complicated'?  Maybe you would; but for me, life is complicated enough without becoming entangled with self confessed complications.   

"Hi.  My name is Jerry; & I'm complicated."

Very sexy. 

And aren't we ALL a little complicated? 

Why identify as such on your profile, hence re-enforcing and sustaining a negative affirmation?

Hop OFF that lily pad, I say. 

Onto...actually, on reflection, maybe it's better to avoid the lily pads altogether- they are far too tenuous & unstable. 

Hop onto dry land, and build on that. 

(If you're building, as my Yoga instructor used to say... )

That way...you will also kiss less frogs. 

A NEW START

 

 

A new start. 

Not many people have the luxury of a brand new start. 

Nothing worse than an ungrateful bastard (except maybe a child molester), & I am thankfully neither.  So I TRULY appreciate this rare opportunity. 

& my old life?  the old me?  The identity thieves are welcome to it. 

Like a snake shedding it's worn outer garmant...it's done. 

Today is a new beginning, full of promise and possibility.

Ordinarily, a normal healthy person would have a special woman by his side, to be with him at a time like this...to help see him through. 

Perhaps even I can learn to love again, without fear of punishment, exploitation, betrayal or retribution. 

Yes...even someone such as I.

ANYTHING is possible in this brand new world I shall make for myself.

ANYTHING.


Lucky lucky luck. 

SELF HELPFULNESS

Yesterday was not the best of days- but I survived. 

It was a strange bad day- a vague dull pain kind of day...

Rather than a sharp sting.

Like a migraine pain. 

You can tend to blunder about a bit in this fog; I admit...

I was bumping into things, dropping things, clumsy as hell, couldn't walk a straight line without overbalancing...

Just weird. 

& It was a long dark night, ugly as sin, hell harsh midsummer storms all through the night...

wind tearing strips off my soul...

I felt like Macbeth.

But it was soon over.

Dark clouds pass quickly for me, lately.

It's good. 'This too shall pass'.

'Think thoughts of love...' and I'm right as rain.

A tropical shower, naked lusting hope making love with itself, spawning some kind of collective good for the good of all...

Everything right again.

Much better today...& amidst the weirdness, I learned a few important things about myself.

Which means the day was not a TOTAL write off. 

Not at all.  And that's a good thing.  The devil's consolation prize.

I am back to posting a few encouraging things to keep things moving.

It's about valuing myself this week. 

As inept as I am...

& as soft and sentimental as I may seem when I try to post encouraging positive home grown aphorisms...

I will not be walked all over. 

I might like pussy...but I'm NOT a pussy. 

I just need to believe in myself...& believe that what I am doing, the way I am working and living is RIGHT for me. 

So I try to hang in there with encouraging sayings.

Like 'do anything you want to do'.

I'm sorry if some of my stuff sounds a bit robotic and new- agey... 

But it needs to be clear and concise.

In reality...is it as simple as that?  Probably not.  But for me, it needs to SOUND as though it is.

Or I'll surrender.

Keep it simple...& concise.   

for ME, as much as anyone else. 

REAL SELF HELP. 

seriously...if all your moving parts are operational...

you have EVERYTHING you need for a healthy productive life.

this bullshit about going to 'specialists' for advice...

prodding about in your affairs...

in most cases, it's bogus.

not a SINGLE person here amongst my friends needs anything more than THEMSELVES. 

Unless you have a tumour in your ass.

You're all very cool people, and I learn a HEAP from you. 

you carry your own pack in life- that's the way it should be. 

REAL LOVE is simply empowering others to live fully by your healthy example. 

You do that for me...maybe without even knowing it.

And THAT's as it should be too...

A Piece of Luck

 

At first, I thought it was a butterfly.

The little critter that gaily flittered ahead of me through the open door of my van.

Immediately, I felt I was in for some good luck.  (don't ask me why; just some piece of random new age crap I picked up somewhere.  somehow butterflies and ladybirds are lucky.)

However- my heart sunk when I realised- it was just a cabbage moth.

Why?

Why was I disappointed?

If a butterfly can be a harbinger of good fortune- then why can't a cabbage moth?

I decided to take a couple of pictures of the moth through the window before I set it free.

As I watched the beautiful creature dance joyfully out the back door of my van and return to it's play in the garden- a brilliant luminescence in the midday summer sunshine...

& as I viewed the resulting images, I realised...

The cabbage moth was just as beautiful as a butterfly.

And probably just as lucky. 

Perhaps being able to see this detail was lucky enough.

What a piece of luck.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank You.

In my final moments, on my death bed (or chair, or bus, train, automobile, plane, busy street, or in a forest being torn apart by wild animals), AND if I have all my mental faculties and am not a gibbering embarrassment...I want my last words to be...

"THANK YOU."

I SURRENDER!!!

Valentines Day.

Bah humbug.

Greeting card companies, flowers, chocolate, scented cantles, bath bombs, fluffy cushions and blow up red hearty heart balloons...

Poo to that.

HOWEVER...If you claim to hold LOVE in high regard (as i do), it's hard not to get caught up in the hype. 

I normally resist hype.  (Damn, I won't watch a friggin' Batman flick until all the hubbub has died down!)

Generally speaking...hype is a lot of sound and fury, usually signifying NOTHING. 

BUT...(& pardon my big BUT...) no matter where Valentine's Day comes from...regardless of whether it is the celebration of a martyred saint or a greeting card company's bottom line...

It's a little churlish and disingenuous to resist. 

And why should we?  What are we trying to prove?  How HARD we are? 

How tough, street, and cool, too cool for school AND  love?? 

Why fight it? 

Some kind of conditioning?   

Fighting something like Valentines Day suggests an interest in HATE, more than it does LOVE.

So why do I even FIGHT?? 

Can we really fight and love at the same time?

No. 

So I surrender. 

That's right...as much as I try to resist these manufactured days...& as much as I support loving EVERY day (not just on one special day)...

I hereby lay down my arms. Or rather, I throw my arms around Valentine's Day. 

A special day set aside for LOVE has gotta' be better than a tour of duty in a war zone.  Right??

Right. 

Happy Love Day, Everyone. 

And why not.

FREEDOM

 

 

Be true to yourself. 

Please.  I BEG you. 

I know it is hard, given the pit so many of us have dug ourselves into (or fallen into unwillingly/unwittingly), & I KNOW there is some comfort to be had in the comparative safety and security of the familiarity of our enslavement.

But it is nothing more than carrion comfort.

Please, I urge each and every you to take the steps you need to take to extricate yourselves from the life that may have been imposed upon you by the expectations of others.

Or the false/unrealistic expectations of your own inauthentic being.

We need to release ourselves from the shackles of the grand lie.

That money, power, fame are all.

They are NOT.

We need to set ourselves free from the oppression of lies, in order to find the truth again. 

The truth of love, peace, faith, and hope.     

We need to do this, to be truly free. 

However, you will need to prepare yourself for hardship, resistance, perhaps even grave discomfort, and in certain cases, even imprisonment by the state...

or death. 

Whatever the risk...we MUST set ourselves free, to be who we need to be.

Nothing else matters.

For we NEED a species of AUTHENTIC BEINGS, if we are to have any hope of survival...

Do you want to survive?

Do you want your CHILDREN to survive?

Then tell the truth. YOUR truth.

And it is THAT which will set you free...

SHE

The location of my first kiss.

I remember so well, playing kissey-chasey in the school yard. 

I loved it so much. 

It was my favourite game, and I always looked forward with great anticipation to playing it. 

I was a romantic from a very early age- no doubt about it.

As a little boy...love was my truth.

Even Mum says I was a good, loving little boy.

I soon had that beaten out of me by my father, and by the priests.

I have been SO LOST in my life...but even in my darkest moments...

I knew I wanted to find my truth; that truth I drifted so far away from.

I wanted the little boy back.

That clever gentle, sensitive little boy who KNEW love was all that really mattered.

It was a long hard road out of hell.  And I knew...I had to find a way to commit to the journey- follow it through NO MATTER WHAT.
I wonder if life is merely the spiritual being living a physical life.  For it's own sake- for the experience; in order to test itself. 

The iron will of the soul, forged in the fires of adversity. 

Maybe. 

Perhaps life is about forgetting who we really are...

Then REMEMBERING again. 

Bolstering, re-inforcing and corroborating the authentic being.

Knowing who we are...no matter what. 
 
I remember. 

I remember how important love WAS to me- as a little boy- and how important it IS to me as a fully grown man. 

I am reminded of Antoine de Saint-Exupery when he said, "How could there be any question of acquiring or possessing, when the one thing needful for a man is to become -- to be at last, and to die in the fullness of his being.”

The soul doesn't lie.

I am reminded of my first kiss, and the magic of love.

The miracle of the divine feminine, which- even then- I was aware of. 

Only an hour ago, I was writing sentence on auto-pilot the way I usually do (my hands were writing old news as my brain had already moved onto the next thought), and instead of 'THEY' I typed 'SHE'. 

To paraphrase Jung...there ARE no accidents. 

No typo's.

Love is all...

<3 p="">

Remember...

Remember This??

Just in case your memory is hazy...this is kids having fun. 

Without the need for a i box, or a pod phone or a XT or HD doo-hickey or anything. 

Now...don't mistake me for a technophone; I love technology and what it has done for my life as much as anyone.  Hell!  I live here! 

But I don't feel I need an Iphone; and unless one falls from the sky into my lap...I shall do without. 

Seeing these boys yesterday outside my place rolling an old tractor tyre along the cliff- it was a beautiful thing.  It reminded me of the good old days. 

Well, the old days were not so great...but I do remember enjoying simple things. 

Like playing with found objects. 

One of MY favourite things to do as a kid was ride my bike around town, looking for empty bottles so I could take them to the shop and get the money back. 

Re-cycling!  Aaahhh...those were the days. 

And this kind of fun does not rely on bandwidth.   

I'm not saying unplug and stand outside looking at all God's miracles (although I don't exactly discourage that!), but I am saying...

What am I saying? 

I think I say enough.  I think maybe we all do. 

Just look at the boys, playing peacefully with an old tyre. 

And remember...

 

Ample.

And speaking of divine feminine energy & 'ample' breast...let's deal with another 'home truth'. 

Deep down...most guys love a 'fuller figured woman'. (I'm one of them.) 

But most men are either conditioned over the years by the media to a particular type they will likely NEVER find (even if they really wanted it), or they are still slaves to this notion that having a big girl is somehow...questionable. give me a hot coochie momma over a walking skeleton any day.

These antiquated notions (& other ones like 'it is right to hit women', 'war is a good thing' & 'Hollywood should keep re-making old TV shows') should be drowned like plague rats.

It's about knowing your own truth, and owning it. 

I denied most of my own natural feelings/inclinations in order to fit in with what was 'expected' by my peers.

I remember even as a kid, that playground crap about 'fat chicks'...

I loved ALL types of women. 

As a child...you don't have bigotry. You pick that up along the way.

Hence, I was gradually socialised into an aversion for certain 'types'; fat, buck toothed, freckled, flat chested, even RED HEADS!  Are you kidding me????

And according to my observations- this bullshit hasn't gone anywhere. 

Here's to all the women (& men) who have children, and especially those who have young boys.

Well done you for helping to encourage a strong young male mind; he will need it for bilge like this.

Of course a woman's mind, personality etc are paramount...but if we MUST focus on physical beauty (& of course we must!) then why not face facts? Big sexy women are here, and they are here to stay. 

In Australia, there is a campaign at the moment encouraging the ampler women to model-  & an emerging market to accomodate them. I think this is wonderful. & it is working. This way...if we cannot encourage young men to think for themselves...then at LEAST we can affirm the natural inclinations and tastes of the weak minded with pop culture. Hooray, I say...

Big sexy women are here, and they are here to stay. 

I am thinking of a healthy boy with a very healthy mother at the moment.

She is kind, caring, attentive to his needs, requirements and his development, and at the same time wary of her own influence on the boy.

She questions the way she is bringing him up every single day.

What more can you ask, really?   I think she is doing JUST FINE.

I wish I had that kind of upbringing; I had to re-learn all the healthy ways of thinking and behaving.

Thank you to all the 'mothers' who are helping me to be a better man.  

I am thinking of you today...

With love. 

Safe.

Another thing I realised...I just feel safer with women. 

I guess that's why I have so many female friends. 

I remember when I was a little boy, I was on a trip somewhere; Mum and Dad were in the front of the car (Dad driving- he always drove) and I was sitting with my Auntie Lorraine in the back. 

I was feeling sleepy, so she let me lay my head down on her ample breast, & I slept soundly and peacefully.  Like a baby. 

I was not so sure about my Dad- I don't remember EVER feeling safe with him- but I DID feel safe with my Aunty Lorraine.  

On some level deep inside me, I'm a little bit wary of men.  In my twenties and thirties, I can remember starting fights with them in pubs.  I guess this was partly to do with my conditioning (Dad spent endless hours teaching me how to hit other men, saying it was 'the only language they understood'), but I wonder if, on some level, I was not somehow getting them before they 'got' me.    

Like the way I was conditioned to treat women; 'dump them before they dump you'.

I know not all men are like my father- not all men are savage, boorish brutes (just like not all women are angels!), but I simply feel safer with women. 

I noticed they don't start as many major wars as men do; that says something. 

Today, I give thanks for gentle feminine energy.   

Thank you for making me feel safe to be me...& to treat EVERYBODY with love.

Heart.

A Valentine's Day No-Brainer.

"When you love somebody...set them free." 

It scares me about the human race we even need to be told this. 

I have a saying (it's a fairly recent one) "I let you go so I can love you better." 

Seems pretty straightforward...but it's astonishing how many people take this as rejection. 

We are such an insecure species...we need to hold onto things. 

We HAVE to learn to let them go.

Watching the movie "Melancholia" last night...I was reminded of what IS important, and what is not. 

Money, riches, prestige, power...none of these things are important. 

To live, to love, and to LEARN TO LET GO. 

These are all that matter, in the end.

Happy Valentine's Day to all.     

Let's keep going...

Armistice Day.

I was lying in bed last night, & I heard a loud noise in the next room; I was startled, my heart rate leaped, and my breathing quickened.  It was nothing major, but...

I realised...I still felt as though Dad was going to come into my room and thrash me. 

Even though he is now dead, and it was a long time ago...I still carry that legacy inside me. 

I am a grown man; & it still shakes me to my very core. 

I am reminded...I have to find a way to let it go. 

This fear deep inside, and all the latent hatred and negativity that go with it. 

It was 11:11 when I decided to write this piece. 

Armistice Day. 

The war is over, time to start again. 

Time for all the abused children to lay down their arms, and walk away from the battle. 

It is time to flush all the hate, fear, loathing, anger, anxiety, & trauma from our system...

And let love in. 

Love is everything. 

Love is the lullaby for a wounded world.

Let the healing begin...

<3 nbsp="" p="">

Love IS all you need: & I'm going to prove it.

Watch this space, if you dare/care...

It 'aint me, babe.

Next adventure March 19. 

My tastes are not lavish, I stay in dumps and dives and hang out in the poorer parts of town- but these things cost virtually nothing. 

Someone asked me recently how I can afford to travel.  As he took a drag from his cigarette, we established that my last trip cost half his annual cigarette budget.  Blow it out your arse, mate.  It's about priorities. 

I love adventure; and if you do it right, and you have no other commitments, you can do it cheaper than staying at home.  Maybe I should write a book about it- people don't believe it can be done. 

Maybe I will. 

Stop and talk to a backpacker.  If you have the guts. 

Some people think it is money keeping them from living the adventure. WRONG.  It's fear..lack of imagination...& SPIRIT. 

Being ready to DIE in sleazy places to get the pump. 

People baulk at my pics of the ghetto.  & these are NOT Bosnia!  Grow up, and LIVE!!  Get a set of balls, and screw your courage to the sticking place.  (& don't bleat about families and children & job as an excuse- you made your choices.  I know what it's like to be thrashed by an old man who was resentful we held him back.  I DON'T buy it.) 

Someone to blame for staying home?  It 'aint me, babe. 

It's easy to blame others, or look for excuses, or citicize those who are living the dream.

It 'aint me.