A Bad Case of Hang Nail...

 

 

As we approached the entrance of Summerfest, we were greeted by this grisly monstrosity.



 

Nothing angers me more than religious fuckwits spoiling pleasurable family days with gruesome pictures of fictional characters covered in blood and nailed to bits of wood. 

Children have to look at this ghastly crap.  Fictional tales of men tortured and nailed to crosses? 

Encouraging people to eat human flesh and drink human blood?  By way of WORSHIP? 

Are you KIDDING ME???

Way to terrify the children, you mental midgets!

These people have no shame whatsoever.  It's a disgrace- & they don't even realise it.  I'll bet if I held up a picture of Leatherface or Pinhead or some other fictional Icon of Horror- I'd be arrested.

I was glad to see one voice of reason here standing up for decency by returning a double barrelled American salute to these fun-busting superstitious assholes. 

What kind of freak would expose an innocent child to this kind of gore? 

& then ask them to worship it??

There is only one kind.  The religious hate monger.

& THEY get their backs up because we love sinful movies about Zombies, Cannibals and Vampires?

What kind of screwy fucked up world is this???

Nothing makes me angrier than religious hypocrites, and I don't believe in Hell- another fictional construct for the mentally ill- but if there WERE a Hell...

I would hope there is a spot reserved in the hottest part of the Stygian depths for them.  

How's the Serenity Prayer...

God grant me the serenity to accept when things are none of my business, the courage to know when they ARE (and to act accordingly); and the wisdom to know the difference.

Get Fucked.

Oh, that reminds me.

For my new friends- and there are some wonderful new people coming into my life here- I make no bones about using the word 'mother fucker'.

There is nothing wrong with this word.  It is a word much like any other- no better, no worse.  

It is NOT obscene.

What is OBSCENE is bombing other countries for oil.  THAT is obscene.  

But using the word 'mother fucker'?  

Not.

'Provided you don't OVERUSE it.

As a normal human being...there are times when I am nice...

& times when I am a little bit 'nasty'.      

To my mind...there are occasions when nothing will 'git r done' between consensual couples quite like a good 'fuck'.

(I'm not going to go into too much detail, any more than I would talk at great length about any of my other bodily functions.)  

But there are times when I 'make love' like a poet...

& times when I 'fuck' like a beast.

  

It's the duality of man, and nothing to be afraid or ashamed of. 

It's called being HUMAN.

To pretend otherwise is to LIE.  

& I hate lies more than anything. 

Now; 'Mother'?

I am a 'mother fucker'.

Unashamedly so.

I have fucked many mothers...just not my own.

To suggest that a mother- any mother- is somehow no longer capable of the kind of rabid, bestial glorious PASSION that accompanies a good 'fuck'...just because she has given birth...is not only absurd, abhorrent, anachronistic fundamentalist BULLSHIT...

it is also a another LIE.

To suggest a man can like a good fuck...

& not a woman...

Is SEXIST, not to mention MISOGYNIST.

Women do not belong in a nunnery once they have given birth.


Yes...I am a proud mother fucker.

There is nothing wrong with being one.

And there is nothing wrong with using the word.

To suggest there is would be like suggesting a mother cannot experience or has no entitlement to passion- in all it's manifestations.


THIS is about as raw as my truth gets;

nothing particularly confronting, if you are an adult with an open mind.

But if there IS anything here that you find offensive- I urge you in the strongest possible terms to hover that cursor over the 'unfriend' button.

It will save us all a lot of pain and suffering further on down the line.    

& to the 'Mothers' here?

Don't be afraid to 'GET FUCKED'!

Some Sound Bites for Nigella.

Re the Nigella Lawson matter. 

First thing's first.

A spokesperson for the restaurant told the Mirror newspaper: “We do not comment on the private matters of customers.”
Private?

The incident occurred in a public place. A restaurant.

'Private matter'? 

Don't you mean a clear case of DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?

Violence against women anywhere goes without saying; that is not at issue.

Most of the tweets and comments seem to be about the fact that no one intervened. 

Neither anyone from the staff, nor any member of the public.

I think it is sad none of the staff stepped in.

But a member of the public?

People DO NOT INTERVENE, for the most part.

Cowardice?

Maybe. 

But self preservation is another reason. 

& THAT is as primal as your potential for violence under the right circumstances.

So it is natural.

I have another good reason for you not intervening.

I have said this before, but I will repeat it.

I can tell you from experience...intervening in ANY matter of ANY type ANYwhere is very likely to get YOU charged by the police. 

I would intervene anyway, whenever I see any kind of injustice- because it is the right thing to do.

But I do so also because I have this Kafkaesque guilt complex impregnated into me by the Catholic Priests, so I assume I will be arrested and imprisoned at any moment. 

So it doesn't bother me. 

I could also plead insanity.  Let's face it- I have the evidence on my side!!

(Plus I love a bloody good rumble!!)


You have to make your own choices. 

If you believe it is the right thing to do- then step in bravely.  You won't be criticised by me. 

But expect no quarter or dispensation from the police. They ROUTINELY advise against the public 
becoming involved in ANYTHING.

'No good deed goes unpunished.'

Be a hero at your own risk. 

But above all...be yourself...

& NOTHING/NO ONE can touch you.
 

Happy Father's Day, Dad.

I forgive you Father, you knew not what you did. 

I loved you dearly, and you punished me for it.

You were one very sick and troubled individual- & that was your bequest to me. 

That- and one huge 'how not to' manual for living.   

I wish you had the strength to make the choices I am making now. 

You were wrong when you said 'trust nobody'. 

There is always- if not the presence of someone good- then the hope of finding a good person.

Even if it is only yourself.

You had four good people- your wife and sons- who truly loved and trusted you.

But for you- that wasn't enough.

Until you drove us away.

In the end...your prophecy became fulfilled. 

And yet all you needed, finally, was to trust us- your family- & the better angels of your nature.

They were there, inside you, waiting for you to set them free.

All you had to do was have faith, let love, live joyfully...

& accept what was right in front of you.


RIP.

Ferry Across the River of Shit.

I read another missive today dealing with 'FB & the New Narcissism'.
 
Oh dear.

I hate to break it to you...but if you don't love and appreciate yourself, & treat yourself like Brad & Angelina on the red carpet...

Then no one else is going to do it for you.

My view is that the world is set up to try to make you feel small and insignificant. 

To feel interminably ashamed of yourself & who you are. 

It's a very profitable racket for governments and corporations.

There are people lined up to give you shit about being YOU. 

So why not spite them AND do something for yourself?

Something easy, affordable, practical and FUN?

Why not take pictures of yourself and load them online??


LISTEN:  A CELEBRATION OF SELF IS A "FUCK YOU" TO THE OPPRESSORS!
  
WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY!  

What TF else are those swish you-beaut camera/phones for, but to shoot pictures of yourself intearcting with the world around you??!

Life is beautiful! 

Nature is BEAUTIFUL! 

WE are NATURE, and thus...

BEAUTIFUL!!


Please...I BEG you...

Don't let these impotent swine make you feel like you have no right because you don't have a BOOK, A FILM OR A FASHION COVER! 

WHO THE HELL ARE YOU HURTING?

REALLY??

We all dump in the same underground river of shit.

No reason we should feel we have to SWIM in that RIVER OF SHIT!


& life is all just an elaborate illusion anyway, according to Einstein...

So why not do the most REAL thing you can?

Grab that camera or phone...take as many shots of yourself as you like...

plaster them all over the internet if you want, but most of all...

CELEBRATE YOURSELF!!

Who cares who, or how many are looking?

This is about YOU!

It's an ode to yourself.

Any why TF not?

These miserable pricks make it sound like it's an offence against nature to shoot the hell out of yourself from every angle in every place!

IT'S NOT!! 

unless you are shooting young children in compromising positions, or invading the privacy of others...You are FREE to SNAP AWAY TO YOUR HEART'S CONTENT!

Life is actually all about a CONTENT HEART.

If not that...then WHAT??

& if you have CONTENTMENT...

A feeling of WELL BEING...

Then you are more likely to be of more benefit to others.
 
So forget those too bitter in their own hearts to understand JOY when they see it.

These prawns are in DESPERATE need of a blowjob. Or some self love- if only they could stop putting shit on others long enough to give themselves a touch up. 

Forget what others are doing, or might want!

For most of us...it feels GOOD to get a good shot you like and are happy with- one where you look good in a lovely place.

Admit the truth!!

and...

Celebrate yourself. 

It's a lot better than whining interminably and committing suicide on Youtube. 


Two extremes? 

Maybe. 

But one more news flash. 

There IS no middle ground. 

Sitting on the fence is for the birds. 


Make a choice. 

Pick a side. 

Choose the great grand luke warm...

Or YOU.


I can take the bible or leave it- mostly leave it- but if I had to pick a chapter...it would be Revelations.

There is some SICK STUFF in there!

My favourite passage has always been this one; 

"I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot. So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth." -- Revelation 3:15-16 (NKJV)


So LOOK OUT!!

Foreign Objection.

We will never find peace until we drop the word 'foreign'. 

It's the most offensive, noxious, damaging word I can think of, and needs to be expunged not only from our legislation & our legal instruments...

but indeed also from our collective vocabulary.

There are NO foreigners. 

Even if Martians try to settle here- I look forward to extending the spirit of this objection to the entire universe.

Contrary to the views of my learned opponents- among them, those who built factories to gas millions of people they didn't like, and those who hacked millions to death because they were the wrong tribe- I actually think EVERYONE has the potential to bring something of value to the human discourse...even if it is not immediately obvious.

Calling a person a 'foreigner' will not help another human being to make the light of his or her basic humanity any more obvious to the world.

Nor will it help US to do the same for ours...

Confessions of a Middle Man...

Golly.  I hear a lot of crap lately about FB from the feckless lately!

Heaps of it. 

What is with these people??

Enough already. 

There IS NO PRIVACY. 

Either accept this, and PUT A LID ON THE GRIPING...

Or go somewhere private and drown yourself quietly.

Life is life. 

It's just the way it is.

You CANNOT stop it, anymore than you can put the genie back in le bottle.

Live loud and proud...speak and act as if it will be the last thing you say/do.

Respect the privacy and humanity of others...

Don't hand out your bank account details in the main street...

& most of all... BE OF GOOD CHEER!

FB bashers? 

FB was my family, when no one else wanted anything to do with me.  (well, one or two did) 

Anyway...my friends here brought me round, and drew me out of a dark cocoon. 

Narcissist?  Moi???  Maybe.  Not for me to say.  That's for you. 

I hold myself accountable to you guys, so I keep on the straight and narrow, and feel part of a community- in a world that seems often to be largely ambivalent. 

Up myself?  Hmmm.  I quite like who I am now- I 'aint the worst, and I 'aint the best. 

I'm in the middle- just trying to be a better man, and trying to help my brothers and sisters. 

Better than being D-E-A-D, right?

So live life to the full, be yourself, and DON'T BE ASHAMED TO LET YOUR LIGHT SHINE!!

We're only here for a quick cup of coffee...

so might as well make it HOT & STRONG, right??

  

Force Magnified...

I tend to put a lot of shit on cops- some of them are such wretched, murderous brutes, it's hard not to. 

I have met such vicious swine throughout my life...

& like a magnifying glass that reflects the power of the sun to burn things, it can burn a hole in your psyche forever when you meet one of them. 

BUT...I went through a PBT site on Sat, & a guy I used to work with was on line. 

I worked with him over ten years ago, when I was a walloper.  Jason.  Good bloke.  Just a decent bloke.  No deception or subterfuge about him, as far as I can tell. 

Always nice to me. 

Most of the cops I worked with wouldn't piss on me if I was on fire.

I was a bit honest, caring, and sensitive- and it doesn't do, to have cops who care. 'Constable Care', they used to call me, because I worked with kids in proactive policing.

Because I gave a shit about people.

Man...I remember once, I went into hospital to visit a sick baby, and the nurse let me hold her.

It was a precious moment for me.

The following week, I was given an admonishment for being so gentle, sensitive, and caring.

I got the message.

Anyway, that's another lifetime. 

And this is about Jason, not me.

He is...just plain...decent. 

Too decent for the force!

Nah...we could do with more of them.

If I had a division of guys like that- our problems on the planet would be over VERY quickly.

Seeing Jason again was sweet. 

A lovely 'going away' present.

It was nice to have a reminder that there are some decent cops out there. 

You just need a magnifying glass to find them sometimes...

Hard and Fast.

I know this doesn't apply to many of my friends here- I think I have weeded out all the prudes, and you know pretty quickly I have a potty mouth-

but my favourite fuckwits (Billy calls them the 'Fuckless') are those who LOVE Billy Connolly, but then tell me off for my foul language. 

It happened last week.

I hate hypocrisy almost as much as prudishness. 

'Blue Language' as we call it down here...is truth.  & not everyone likes truth, I know. 

"Go away you Ruffian" doesn't work worth a damn in the ghetto. 

Sometimes you gotta' work hard, play hard, talk hard. 

So if words (or IDEAS) don't scare you...

then we will have a ball.  


(Thanks Mel for the kind prompt...)

The Wrong Time

 

 

I hate it when I look at the clock, and it says eleven minutes past nine. 

The clock is wrong- so wrong- twice a day. 

This will never change.

Not until I don't need the clock any more...


RIP