Potty Mouth...

Please forgive me if I have already covered this...but it's a topic worth revisiting & might be worth touching upon for the benefit of my new friends. 

I have something to say about my propensity for drawing attention to my bathroom parts- even though I am approaching 50. 

It happens from time to time; I seem to be drawn to discuss my privates. 

I can't seem to help myself. 

In this regard...I seem to slide into this (bad?) habit and revert to childhood. 

It's almost as if I haven't been properly toilet trained. 

I have been thinking about this for the last hour or so now...a part of me is bothered by it. 

But a part of me knows...it is something almost uncontrollable.

It seems to be my truth...& I will never shy away from my truth, because herein are often contained certain fundamental clues as to my persona, from which I can learn about myself. 

I think it's an interesting topic. 

At times...I find men's/my love for speaking about our/my Johnson quite tiresome and boorish. 

I'm a reasonably intelligent, spiritually attuned fellow; but I doubt I will ever be considered for PM or the Nobel Peace Prize, given my priors for talking freely and openly about my doodle.

I find something strangely...cathartic about raising the subject in a frivolous way occasionally. 

I assumed it had something to do with my sexual abuse as a child- but it might not have.

Maybe ALL men do it. 

Maybe most women do it. 

I have a feeling...my making light of these topics may have saved my life.  (given me a way to process my sexual molestation at a young age without going totally batty.) 

Many people in my position have killed themselves WAY before this. 

It is best left to the judgement of others whether this is a good thing or not.  I have certainly come to see any life as precious, so hence, see it as a positive. 

So...if this is how I process that early abuse...then more power to me, I guess.

But I can understand how some people might find it immature, and offensive.

I think as adults in a perpetual state of arrested development...we do what we can to survive... 

& rely on the kindness and patience of our friends. 

So thank you.

  

I Like Head.

I like my head.

& I especially like people who post their head in their profile pic on FB.

If you like your head, you probably like the rest of you.

And if you like all of you...you will likely like all of others.

I am an other...& that means you might like a-me.

And if I like-a me like you like-a you...& we like a-both-a same...

I LIKE THAT!!

Pregnant Paws...

And another thing. 

You won't hear men saying this very often, because it can be misinterpreted in so many ways by women that it's often better to keep your mouth shut- but the fact is...

I, and most of my friends, think pregnant women are very sexy indeed. 

She doesn't have to be my woman- pregnant with MY baby to be sexy. 

This isn't a power trip. 

Nothing to do with ownership, or any of that macho shit.

Man, I even have a book full of pregnant ladies, & it is the sexiest thing I have EVER seen.

This is it; " Pregnant Goddesshood: A Celebration of Life."

The book is a thing of beauty, as are the women contained therein.

So...if you are pregnant and feeling 'ugly' or 'fat'...

then you are also out of your mind. 

Revel in your beauty; the earth mother only has this very special glow for...nine?  nine months.

So make the most of it. 

You are SEXY AS HELL.

Key Master...

I was in the ghetto the other day, & a Latino gang banger asked me for a smoke. 

I gave him a couple, and he asked me if I was from OZ.  I confirmed his suspicions, and he instantly warmed to me. 

(It's funny, that.  We seem to be well liked.  It doesn't hurt a traveller to come from a country people like...especially in gang territory!) 

Anyway...then he asked me what I was doing in the ghetto. 

I told him I like it in the ghetto. 

He looked stunned. 

I told him, I have tried yacht clubs and I have tried ghettos...& I just prefer ghetto's. 

I like the honesty. I like the danger. I like to LEARN.

(& don't forget...I can LEAVE any time I want. THAT is the important bit.) 

Then he asked me how I could travel, being as how it's so expensive. 

Sigh...I looked at his burning cigarette, & I asked him; 'how many cigarettes a day do you smoke?'

He replied 'one, maybe two packs.' 

I said, 'you give up the smokes for a few months, you got airfare and walking around money right there.  Any country you want.'

He nodded in agreement.  'Damn!  You're right!'

Priorities, people, priorities.

How badly do you want your freedom?

How much do you love your prison???

Some of you guys are in prisons of your own making. 

Work with me here...I know you can set yourselves free.
 

You just need someone not from your life to show you where the key is...

Cramming.

Not everybody is a firecracker right off the blocks. 

I was born into complete mediocrity.  I had all the ambition of a block of cement.  I aspired to nothing, desired nothing...except to be left alone. 

And yet...motivation toward higher things dawned upon me over time. 

I'm not sure why...it just did. 

So now I am cramming a bunch of meaningful things into the last little bit of my life. 

That counts too.

Never too late, I guess... 

True North...

If you are TRULY interested in kindness as a way of life...you will always come back to it. 

Like True North...you won't be able to help yourself.

You will be drawn to it. 

And if not...something else will most surely attract you.

This is the way of the world. 

Fight it at your peril...

Or smash the compass under the heel of your boot and choose the wilderness of the soul....

Forever.  

Fullashit Daichi...

Once the Fullashit alarm has been tripped...there is generally no going back.

The toxins have begun to seep. 

By that I mean, that point in the relationship where you KNOW the other person is NOT built on a foundation of truth, does not mean what they say, and will not do what they say they are going to do. 

That point when you KNOW that person does NOT have your best interests at heart.

Of course it is worth noting...rarely will you find a person who has never behaved in this way.

Human beings are flawed creatures...& we make mistakes.

Forget things. 

Are distracted by our own woes to the point of carelessness.

Become so ill we do not know what we are doing.

Of course discretion is the better part of valour.

Of course it makes sense to give people several chances; it would be a very lonely place without some forgiveness. 

We ought to note that this should manifest as a pattern of behaviour.

So...when someone CONSISTENTLY lets you down, reneges on their word...and does not acknowledge it with a contrite heart...

This is generally the beginning of the end.

And the friendship seeps into the ocean, from whence it all began...