This is doing the rounds at the moment.
Here is the unexpurgated version if you want to read it.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10022060433
Now...I have nothing against George.
He's a pretty funny guy
In fact...
He has made me wet myself on more than one occasion.
But that was a long time ago.
These days...I don't exactly get choked up over the man.
I haven't for some time.
I have blogged about this before...but I would like to go into a little more detail.
Bear with me.
Now...I know some people genuflect before Carlin's likeness like he was some kind of Messiah.
I also know, to an extent, I used to.
But not anymore.
Why???
Let me show you, using an excerpt from George's..."Jammin in New York."
"See, somehow, I can't feel sorry for an anorexic, you know? Rich cunt, don't want to eat? Fuck her. Fuck her. Don't eat! I give a shit. Like I'm supposed to be concerned about this. "I DON'T WANNA EAT!"
Go fuck yourself.
[laughter]
Why don't you lie down in front of a railroad train right after you don't eat? What kind of a God damned disease is that, anyway? "I DON'T WANNA EAT!" How do we come up with this shit in this country? Where do we get our values from? Bulimia, there's another all-American disease. This has got to be the only country in the world that could ever have come up with bulimia. Got to be the only country where some people are digging in the dumpster for a peach pit, other people eat a nice meal and puke it up intentionally."
Hot damn.
Very funny.
Not.
Two things; the man is clearly a heartless, insensitive cunt.
& his grasp of the psychological complexities of profound eating disorders would be...hmmm...
non-existent.
Funny?
Maybe.
To many.
At one time...even to me.
When I was a heartless, insensitive prick.
When I was a cop.
I got it.
But is it...
Humanitarian?
No.
George is exactly why I love Kurt Vonnegut so much.
He would never have said such a thing- & he was funny as hell.
You see...
A few years ago...
I discovered something called 'empathy'.
I had to suffer and struggle and break down to find it...
I had to take a beating from life...
I had to have the shit kicked out of me time and again...
until I woke up and faced the fact...that I was basically a self centred egotistical shit.
I changed.
I suffered...
& it changed me.
Suffering taught me to know what it is like when others suffer.
That...to me...is an important life skill.
I could no more say to a woman suffering from Bulimia 'GO FUCK YOURSELF' than I could say to myself if I was suffering, 'go fuck yourself'.
I care about others as much as I care about myself.
Because I KNOW suffering.
And it is NOT funny.
& it is NOT something you can help.
If you could???
YOU WOULDN'T FUCKING DO IT!
Anorexia is not some attention garnering dodge.
Bulimia is not some malingerers fiddle.
These are VERY SERIOUS DISEASES.
This is NOT 'some rich cunt doesn't wanna' eat', George.
These illnesses KILL people.
They are terrible, terrible things.
& NO ONE would will them upon themselves deliberately.
I hope, George, you meet some of them...up there...
In that afterlife you don't believe in.
I don't know what the fuck happens when we die.
What George did while he was alive is none of my fuckin' business.
Even LESS so now he is dead.
But what he said...the legacy he left behind...
DOES matter.
DOES bear being scrutinised.
Because people with the illnesses to which he refers actually TAKE THIS CRAP ON BOARD.
AND THEY SHOULD NOT.
These illnesses are vicious enough...
& we have enough negative voices in our heads pleading with us to turn the lights out...
Without people like George peddling his admittedly persuasive negativity like Kool Aid at a Die In.
I don't know what happens when we die.
There could well be an eternal amusement park waiting for us.
But until I know for sure...
I will stick with what I DO know.
I DO know we should CARE!!
WE SHOULD GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ONE ANOTHER!!
I'm basically a middle class guy- with most of my basic needs met, and nothing too earth shattering to complain about in terms of my basic health and well being...
Except I occasionally suffer from Depression.
Depression can be life threatening.
Those moments when I wonder is it all worth bothering...
I would hope for a little more compassion than the kind George advocates.
& I would hope- if someone came to me loaded with bread...but in a state of profound malaise from a clinical depression...
I could muster a little more than "GO FUCK YOURSELF".
Here's some more from George, Jammin joyfully.
"I want to see a paint factory blowing up. I want to see an oil refinery explode. I want to see a tornado hit a church on Sunday. I want to know there is some guy running through the K-mart with an automatic weapon firing at the clerks. I want to see thousands of people in the streets killing police men. I want to hear about a nuclear meltdown. I want to know the stock market dropped by 2000 points in one day. I want to see people under pressure! Sirens, flame, smoke, bodies, graves being built, parents weeping, exciting TV, I just want some entertainment. You know what I love the most, is big chunks of concrete and firing wood falling out of the sky and people are running and trying to get out of the way. It's the kind of guy I am!
At least I admit it! The more bad news the faster the system collapses, fine by me!"
Wow.
Never in my worst nightmare could I imagine enjoying this.
Watching closed circuit video of the Colombine shooting STILL makes me nauseous, and leaves me shaking, heart beating uncontrollably, cold sweat down my back.
Still.
No matter how many times I see it.
I get NO pleasure from such things.
At least I admit THAT.
Is this the same man who said,
"Remember to spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side. Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent. Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. And always remember, life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by those moments that take our breath away. "
????
Apparently it is.
We are all basically animals...
& full of contradictions.
If I had to have an epitaph...
mine would be...
never say anything in TOO didactic a fashion.
you will likely say something to the contrary in a few days.
(or, if you have a personality disorder or other illness...perhaps in a matter of minutes.)
And if you ADMIT to this human frailty...
this duality...
& you ASPIRE TO SOMETHING BETTER...
Then consider being a person who is SOLID.
Who says what they mean, means what they say, & STICK TO IT.
Rather than going with the tides of mood and emotion...
One minute saying 'we should all fucking die'...
& then saying 'we should love one another.'
That's like smacking a dog and then cuddling it.
We all struggle with this duality.
Well...most of us.
If we live in the real world.
We would do well to watch what we declare as our world view.
I'm still learning.
Learning and growing.
Learning to be...
Solid.
Dependable.
Sturdy.
Reliable.
& ABOVE ALL...
HUMANITARIAN.
CARING.
I am learning to embrace my beliefs...
Settle into them...
& hold onto them.
Rather than allowing myself to be persuaded by the vagaries and temptations of opposing opinions. ...
Changing what I believe, and what I espouse variously, depending on how I feel that day.
(basically lying)
Rather than being available to the highest bidder in the auction house of popular opinion...
I seek to traverse these cruel and unkind seas...
I resolve to climb aboard a life-raft built of solid core beliefs.
And ride that truth...
My soul truth...
on the waves of adversity.
Prefer instead not to be someone so easily taken by these waves...
prevaricating from one position to the next as if hustled and bustled...
dashed and drenched in a hurly burly...
But be someone holding tight to what I truly believe in my heart.
And stick with it...no matter what battering I might take from the oceans of bi-polarity.
And then...in time...
Be so solid and true in my convictions...
That I transcend my urges to play merry hell with these same addictive cruel seas...
But somehow travel apart from them.
Learn to circumnavigate them.
Skate along them.
to a place where my craft...
& I...
can be seen to be a safe haven for other swimmers,
who find themselves cast asunder by the opposing forces of the waves of incongruity.
& for these people...who seek some...
solace, some certainty,
some reliability...
Like I did.
Like I have.
& I will be there to pull them to safety.
& give them assured passage...
To a better...
higher and drier...
place.
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